


Where We Go From Here

by Takada_Saiko



Series: Truth in the Lies [65]
Category: The Blacklist (TV)
Genre: F/M, Keen2, Two Keens Are Better than One
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-15
Updated: 2016-01-15
Packaged: 2018-05-14 04:48:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5730106
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Takada_Saiko/pseuds/Takada_Saiko
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The dust has settled, and Liz and Tom have a serious discussion about the future.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Where We Go From Here

Notes: AnonAuthor-A put in a request for Liz waiting for Jacob at Wing Yee's and this story exploded from it. I was kind of hoping for a scene with Jacob outside the courthouse when Liz was released in the show last night. Sadly, we didn't get that, but this is how I'm coping lol.

**Where We Go From Here**

There are turning points in life that can make a person sit back and reevaluate exactly what is important to them. Elizabeth Keen felt like finding herself on the receiving end of a plot to frame her as a terrorist and kill her certainly qualified as one of those life-altering events. Red had warned her that it was. Shooting Connolly had been necessary. Even when they took her badge from her she couldn't deny it. She had protected the people that she cared about, and in turn they had protected her. Reddington had formulated the plan and the others had seen it through. It left her with a clearer understanding of just who she could trust in her life, and somehow, after everything, that made her feel a little more safe.

Until she could find a place of her own, Red had lent her his apartment in the city. The cat was decent enough company, and Dembe and Mr Kaplan had dropped by once each during her stay there. Ressler had called to check in with her, as had Cooper. Aram had dropped by. Three days in, though, she was starting to go a little stir crazy. It wasn't that she didn't know why. She had just expected him to be the first to reach out to her, and when he didn't, she wasn't entirely sure what to make of it.

Liz found herself seated at Wing Yee's late that afternoon. It was pouring rain, but Red was out handling business and she had dug up an umbrella and taken off. It was a stretch, she knew, but she no longer had his phone number and it was all she had. If he wasn't going to call her, she wanted to at least make the effort. After everything he had done for her - everything that they had been through - she wanted to make sure Tom knew how much it meant to her.

What that was exactly, though, Liz wasn't entirely sure. She was grateful, of course, but she always found herself on the fence about her ex-husband. One moment she did her best to remind herself that he had upended her life in ways that she had never expected and that had come close to destroying her, but in the next… She remembered the way he looked at her in those moments since he had come back in her life. It was open and honest and reminded her so much of all those times that she had loved him as Tom. She was fairly certain by this point that he had always loved her, even if he didn't know how to go about that. She just wasn't sure what that meant for them moving forward.

"Can I take your order?"

Liz looked up, startled out of her thoughts to see the waitress. "Sure. If I could just-"

"Oh my… It _you_!"

The former agent blinked. Great. _This_ was why she hadn't left Red's apartment much. Every time she did, someone recognized her.

"You're the lady from the photo. The one I talked to on the phone!"

For half a beat, Liz was even more confused, but then it slowly started to come to her. The waitress. The one that had given her Tom's cell number. "Hi," she said awkwardly.

"Did you find him?"

"Yeah, we ran across each other briefly. I was… kind of hoping he'd be here?"

"He hasn't been by in awhile," the waitress answered. "There was a guy, though, that came in looking for you both. He said you had inherited some money?"

Liz shrugged. "I don't know." She looked out the window and sighed. "Maybe today's the day he'll show. I'll order while I wait."

The waitress smiled. "You never know. He seemed really taken with you. Wish I had someone that got that look when he talked about me."

"Yeah, he's… He's something," she answered softly, a smile tugging at the corner of her lips.

She sat at the little table and watched the rain. The food came and sat nearly untouched in front of her as she waited. Finally she had to admit to herself that he wasn't coming. It wasn't like he knew she was there anyway, and to expect him to just appear seemed silly.

Liz got her food to go and pulled her hood up in her rain coat. The streets were half flooded from the downpour and she trudged through them, fighting the wind to keep her umbrella up and useful. Her feet led her towards the docks, and she squinted against the rain at the boats rocking against the pier. Tom might not magically appear at a restaurant that they had once used as their romantic rendezvous, but he might be in the last place that she knew he'd called home.

She worked her way down and onto the boat that she recognized, finding it tied in place. Carefully she knocked on the door, not wanting to spook him if he didn't have cameras rigged to alert him of an arrival, and waited until she heard shuffling. She was about ready to knock again when the door slid open and Tom blinked in surprise. "What the… Come here. It's pouring." He reached out and offered her a hand down the steps.

She took it and stepped in, letting him shut the door behind her and lock it. Carefully she started peeling her layers off and he took them without a word, tossing them in the tiny bathroom to dry in the equally tiny shower. Liz watched him, moving to set the food down. She'd ordered a little more before leaving. "Have you eaten yet?"

"You got out in this mess to bring Wing Yee's?" he asked, his expression torn between thinking she was a little nuts and happy to see her.

"I've been laying low since getting out. I was going crazy."

"Yeah, it'll do that." He gave her a small smile, like he wasn't quite sure why she was there.

Liz pulled in a deep breath. "It's gone a little cold. I'll heat it up if you get us something to drink?"

They moved around each other in the tiny space until they had their Chinese food and a beer each set out in front of them at the little table. Tom took a seat and Liz felt his eyes on her. She closed her eyes, reminding herself that she didn't need to have everything sorted out before she said it. "I wanted to come here and thank you."

A small, thin smile tilted his lips. "It was nothing."

"That's not true," she argued immediately, her gaze meeting his. "You could have left and never looked back… Just started over. That's what you wanted."

"What I wanted - what I _still_ want - is for you to be safe and… and happy, Liz." He looked down at his food, and in impulse she reached for his hand under the table. He squeezed her fingers and looked back up at her. "That's all I want."

She offered him a smile. "Are you going to stay?"

"I…" He pulled his hand away, and busied it with the chopsticks she'd brought with her. "I want to."

"That doesn't sound like you will though," she responded softly, and was a little surprised by how sad that made her.

"I'm… Can I tell you something real?"

"Of course."

"I'm really tired of running. I've been running most of my life and I'm just… tired."

He looked it, sitting on the edge of the bed, stirring his takeout with the chopsticks in his hand and not meeting her eyes. Liz scooted closer to him, reaching out so that her fingers touched his cheek very lightly. He looked at her and she swallowed hard. "Then stop running. Stay."

Tom gave her a shaky sort of smile. "If I stay my handler will kill me. He put a price on my head, Liz."

"Didn't you tell me he raised you?"

Her ex shrugged. "Guess that doesn't mean a lot to him." He closed his eyes, leaning into her lingering touch. "I want… I want to be someone better than I was. I don't guess I really know what that means, but I don't think I can figure it out until this is dealt with. I can't run anymore. I have to face it."

"Tom, you just said he wants to kill you," Liz pressed.

"I know. That's why… I can't make you any promises because I can't live up to them. I told you I'd be honest. It's what you deserve." His expression tightened. "You deserve so much more than I-"

She shifted, half standing from her place and she pressed a kiss to his lips. He stopped speaking and she felt his hand move up to the side of her face as the kiss deepened. They toppled back, Liz half on top of him, and when they finally broke they were both breathless. "Don't go," she said roughly, the thought of never seeing him again setting such a terrible hollowness inside of her that she thought it might take over.

"I have to. You have to figure out what you're doing here and I have to make sure I'm not looking over my shoulder the rest of my life." He leaned up to where she was leaned over him and kissed her again. "I love you, Lizzie. I always have."

"Promise me you'll come back if you have to go. Tom-"

"I can't, Liz. Not if you want me to be honest." He reached up and brushed a strand of hair back behind her ear. "But I'll promise you that if I come out of it alive, you're the only person I want to see."

She nodded, silently accepting the best she could receive. Liz pulled in a shaky breath and laid down against him. "Hey," he prompted, and shifted her gently so that they could both stretch out the correct direction on the bed. She laid there, her ex husband gently stroking her hair.

"How am I supposed to get to know the real you if you do something stupid like this?" she asked after a few minutes.

"If I don't, the danger'll just come here. I can't forgive myself if I get you hurt, Liz."

"You're not going to let me talk you out of this, are you?"

"I have to do it."

She tightened her hold on him. "When?"

"I have a meet set up tomorrow with him."

"Can I stay tonight?"

She could almost hear him smiling as he pressed a kiss to her dyed hair. "Of course."

They talked into the night, their dinner left untouched on the table. Tom told her small truths about himself and Liz talked about the things that had changed. It felt so normal, even with the storm raging outside. Somewhere along the conversation she fell asleep, more comfortable in his arms then she had been in a very long time.

* * *

"You seem distracted, Lizzie."

Liz looked up from where she had been staring at the same page of the same book for some time. She blinked as her eyes slowly focused on Red. She hadn't even heard him come in. "I'm just… thinking, I guess."

He sighed softly. "There was nothing you could do to stop him from going."

"I really don't want to talk about Tom with you, Red. You and I see him differently."

"That's true," he agreed softly. "Though I do hate to see you sad. I can put aside my own feelings if it will help you."

Liz closed her eyes and wiped at the tears that escaped. "I shouldn't be so upset. I mean, really, I don't even _know_ the man. He's not Tom. He's someone else entirely different. Tom couldn't… As much as he loved me, the man I married couldn't have helped you get me free. He wouldn't have known how. He gave up everything for that and I… I should have done more."

"There was nothing more you could have done, Lizzie. If he had stayed, he would have gotten you hurt, likely killed."

Liz felt Reddington wrap an arm around her and she leaned into him. "I just wanted a chance to… to know why…."

"Why you still love him," he finished for her sadly and she nodded, a sob escaping her.

A soft beeping sound came from inside Red's jacket and he eased back, pulling the burner phone out. He looked at the message and nodded. "I can't fix everything for you, Lizzie, but I will always prefer your smile to tears. Take a walk with me?"

"Red, I'm really not-"

"Nonsense. Fresh air will do you good."

She followed him sluggishly, slipping her boots on and he handed her a coat. They walked out of his apartment and down through a park nearby, down and around through the people that had taken their children out to enjoy the sunny day. Liz followed silently as Red chattered about a little bit of everything and a whole lot of nothing. Finally he stopped and she shot him a questioning look. "I'll give you one last warning, Elizabeth," he said seriously, "and that's it. He is dangerous. What you have felt in the last few days when you were certain he was off doing whatever heroic act you've painted his consequences in is likely to be much worse the day he slips back into the only thing he's known, but… The decision is yours, and not for me or even Bill McCready to take from you. All I ask is that you remember that Tom Keen is very dead. That young man over there is something else entirely different."

Liz followed his gaze and saw her ex-husband sitting on a park bench, looking very intently at the cup of coffee in his hands. She looked up at the man that had saved her so many times and, somehow, she knew she had him to thank again. "Thank you," she managed before she started forward.

He looked like he had been in a scuffle. His face was bruised and she saw that his wrist was wrapped, the bandages peeking out from beneath his jacket. His eyes were focused downward, but he looked up as she came a little closer, and a small smile pulled his lips. "Hey."

"Hey," she echoed as she closed the space between them and took a seat next to him. "Are you okay?"

"Better than I expected, honestly. Sorry I didn't call. I've been running like crazy to get some things together."

"But you're free?"

He watched her a moment. "Yeah, I guess I am."

She smiled and reached a hand out that he took. "Well then. I'd really like to get to know you a bit better, Jacob."

His expression lit instantly. "I'd like that too. Can I buy you a cup of coffee?"

"I think that'd be a good start," she agreed and she squeezed his fingers. There were no promises, no guarantees that this wouldn't end with both of their hearts on the floor, but if there was one thing Liz had learned it was that life required a little risk, and this one was one she was willing to take. He had risked his life to help bring her home, and now, maybe, they could start figuring out exactly where they went from there.


End file.
